Having lived in the south since I was nine, I am completely accustomed to the southern way of life. I’ve never given our style of dress, mannerisms or monograms much thought, they are just as they should be. However, this weekend I was treated to a new view of the south. I have seen the south through the eyes of a “Midwest girl.” I have seen the south through the eyes of @SamHirshberg.
Sam is a Midwest girl born and raised. I’ve been trying to get her to blog on LMM for quite some time now, just so we can get another perspective up here. I don’t think it was until she stepped foot in Atlanta and experienced the south at it’s finest that she ever really realized quite how different things are below the Mason-Dixon line.
So, because most of you are indeed southern, I thought it would be just as fun for you to see the south through the eyes of a Midwest girl as it has been for me. Because let me tell you, it has really made my weekend.
So to start off I was introduced to the undying obsession people down here have with chicken. Start your day off right with a chicken biscuit or for those of you not from the south, a chicken tender on a biscuit. If that does not suffice you can have chicken and waffles?? If that’s not enough chicken for you, head to Chik-fil-a for a chicken sandwich with what I thought was a misplaced pickle. I later found out that it was meant to be there, but still feel like it is out of place. Enough about chicken.
Let’s talk about going out. I have never seen so much Polo attire, croakies, Master’s hats/visors, khakis, Sperry’s, koozies and sundresses. I felt like I was headed to a golf tournament, but no I was walking into a “casual” evening out in a bar. I do not even know where to begin, I was in such awe. We can start with the koozie, an invention I have found only to be useful tailgating. Down here they have one with them at all times because god forbid their hand touches a cold drink. Next I am really confused on why post sundown guys find it necessary to wear sunglasses with croakies and a hat/visor. There really is no excuse for that. In the midwest polo’s are not uncommon, but the guys down here only wear polo’s that are pink, yellow, green or blue pastels. These guys must be very comfortable with their masculinity.
I met some of Michelle’s friends and they were talking about monograming something. I thought it was an inside joke and laughed it off. I was wrong. Monograming could be a major at southern schools. I learned not only what monograming is, but also the “rules” to monograming. So for those of you unfamiliar with the “rules” here is a quick run-down of some need-to-know facts:
1. A person should NOT mongoram post turning 25 because it could hurt your chances of getting married.
2. A person can monogram ANYTHING…hats, koozies, underwear, frames, lunchboxes, totes, stationary, etc.
3. When a person marries your monogram changes, so be prepared!
So for those of you not familar with the midwest, it is really laidback and lacks social rules. I have learned that the south functions only because they have so called “social rules”. One of the things I learned is that one should always bring at very least alcohol and if you really want to impress, an appetizer/dessert when attending a dinner party. But the rule has exceptions. If you do not know the hostess very well bring some other housewarming gift. These can consist of potted plants, flowers and some sort of a basket. Another exception is that if a person is going to stay at a friends for an extended stay, the above mentioned do not all apply. It is only acceptable to bring a potted plant (which still astounds me) or a gift basket (which I have no clue what you would fill it with). Wait! The rules continues…If you are meeting your boyfriend’s parents there are also appropriate items to bring to them. You must first research, because if his parents are conservative and boring and do NOT drink, bringing a bottle of wine would be strike one. So post research, the next thing to consider would be the location of the meeting. If it is at their house then use that research and buy them something appropriate, but careful! If you are meeting them at a restaurnant do NOT bring anything. That is only ONE “social rule” down here in the south. I have a headache just from typing it, let alone attempting to put it into practice. Ridiculous!
So the south not only have a laundry list of “social rules” they also have a laundry list of sayings that do not mean what you would think they would mean. Take for example these sayings:
1. Bless her heart Rest of the world – would be said out of fondness South – an insult, that a person is not liked
2. He is such a nice boy Rest of the world -he is such a nice boy South – he is boring, a definite dud
3. She has a pretty face Rest of the world – she has a pretty face South – she is fat
4. You are so pretty Rest of the world – you are so pretty South – used as an insult after the person has said something stupid
To sum it up, a word of advice…If you plan on moving to the south be sure you eat chicken, own golf attire, learn the “social rules” (buy Emily Post’s book) and do not take anything said at face value.
Good luck to “y’all” (you all)!
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Ah! I love it! I’m a midwestern-er turned southern and everything is so true!